Welcome to bureaucracy

So this morning we went to the Israeli Consulate to sign some papers for our house purchase. This should have been a simple, in-and-out procedure.

Of course, it never is! It was more like a comedy of errors.

First, we almost missed our train into the city, and had to run like Bats out of H*ll to make it - all while carrying a baby.

We B"H made it to the train, but realized we forgot to buy the tickets. Daniel tried to "shmooze" the ticket collector on the train to not charge us the $10 penalty for buying on the train, but it didn't work. D'oh! (Daniel's note- Ussually I am pretty good, I even read the book)

We arrived at the consulate when it just opened, so we hoped this would not take long. Before we could enter the consulate offices, we had to pass through the metal detectors. Daniel shmoozed the security guards to let me in ahead of the line, since I needed to feed the baby and couldn't wait much longer. (Daniel's Note - I told you I was good. Not mentioned was in two words I avoided the security inquisition as well) Daniel passed through security without a problem. Then it was my turn...

I passed through the metal detector. The metal detector beeped. I removed my watch. It beeped again. I removed my necklace. It beeped again. I told the security guards about my metal hair clips under my hat. They needed to do a body search. So then I waited (so much for getting in 'ahead'!)...and waited...Finally the woman security guard arrived. They took me into a room (uh, oh...) and the woman took me behind a screen so she could do a thorough check of me. I took of my hat & showed her the clips - no problem. Then she started scanning my body with a wand - and it kept on beeping. I wasn't wearing any metal, but my skirt seam was making the wand beep. So for the first time in my life, I was patted down. In the end, we pulled some 'proteczia' and reminded to the security guards that I used to work at the Jewish Agency when I worked for Tehilla. They called one of the security guards from THAT office, and fortunately, one of the guards remembered me, and described me as "Bachura Me'Od Nechmada" (A Sweet Girl). With that, they apologized for the complications and let me in.

I fed the baby while Daniel waited on another line, and then it was our turn. We approached the window and showed the 'pakida'(literally a clerk, but in Israel so much more I found this great story about the "pakid of the Year") the documents we needed to have signed. She looked at them and said "You can't sign these, you're missing a page." We explained to her that our lawyer has power of attorney, and he will fill them out. All we need the consulate to do is approve that it is our signatures on the document. She refused and said they couldn't do it.

Argghh!!!

We spent the next half-hour on the phone, trying to reach our attorney, but to no avail. We could not reach him and so we left, unsuccesful in our mission.

Oh well...I guess this is what we have to look forward to!